Months ago, I imagined what this time would be like here on a tropical island for over three weeks of undisturbed writing time moving forward on completing my book on Somatic Awakening. In many ways, it was a dream come true. But, a few days ago, it all exploded in a volcanic eruption of symptoms that forced me fully horizontal, and it painfully reflected back to me that no matter where you go, there you are.

After a productive couple of weeks of writing, with a questionably successful attempt of balancing productivity with down times at the beach and meandering around the Big Island of Hawaii, I got a positive test for Covid. 

Covid Sets In

The first night, the fever was so intense it felt like waves of heat and uncontrollable shaking were taking over my body. It stopped me dead in my tracks. 

Although I still feel like I’ve been hit by a Mac truck, I’m slowly beginning to come out enough to acknowledge what just happened. 

This isn’t my first rodeo with Covid. The last time, it hit me hard with months of long-haul symptoms. So, as you can imagine, I’ve had a lot of feelings about getting it again.

But symptoms are different this time. I’ve not just had the normal fever (which has thankfully broken), cough, and exhaustion, but also something new that’s been super difficult…my knees are in terrible pain. I had been healing from a knee injury. And, as soon as the fever hit, the pain in the knee skyrocketed as if it was newly injured. Unfortunately, at times, I can barely walk because Covid can also come with inflammatory muscle and joint pain. 

Fortunately, I am a naturopathic doctor, which does come in handy sometimes, and I am utilizing a powerful healing protocol.

No Matter Where You Go, There You Are

I don’t share all of this to try to get your sympathy but because there’s a teaching here that may resonate with you. One based on the teaching of Confucious, “No matter where you go, there you are.”

It didn’t matter that I was on a tropical island paradise with the intention of balancing writing and downtime. My psyche came with me, including one of my most well-known voices, “Go,” which contributed to my body feeling stressed from so much pushing, which left me vulnerable to getting this virus.

The “Go” Voice At It Again

In meditation this morning, I found the “Go” voice down at the root of it. We go way back, her and I. And when she’s fully running, it’s difficult to turn “off.” 

In Somatic Awakening®, I train others how to develop a relationship with our ego parts and programs, or what you could call our negative inner voices. This process dramatically decreases these voices running in our lives. And, if it weren’t for this, I’d certainly be a stressed-out Type A personality. But, sometimes, these voices are tricky, especially when they are part of the core part of our ego.

This is the case with my “Go” voice. It is dysfunctionally tied to my inner soul passion. And, to make it even more complicated, this “Go” voice arises from multiple levels of trauma from many lifetimes. It is a modus operandi of my ego, and if I’m not careful, she’ll drive me to exhaustion.

The True Passion

My true passion that this “go” voice is intertwined with is a powerful desire to support humanity in our evolution. 

I feel the call at the core of my being like a lightning rod to be a beacon, in any way I can, to help others find their way to their true essence, healing, awakening, and the light of love. 

I deeply sense the intensity of our times and how we’re being powerfully called to remember the beauty and magnificence of who we are and to make full contact with our higher self, our soul, and Divinity within and without. 

Because I’ve been shown who I am and who we all are, I feel a responsibility to be counted as fully present and doing my part. 

Type A Starseeds

Just last week, before getting sick, I was listening to a powerful young Starseed leader say that once you find your soul mission, you are called to do whatever you can to manifest it, even if that means giving up sleep. “Your focus needs to be on doing all that you can to help people wake up,” she said. 

My response was, “I hear you, sister!” And when I was 28 years old, I did the same thing—I gave it my all. I’ve continued to do the same thing for decades. Even when I was in the deepest parts of my Dark Night of the Soul, I gave it everything I had with the most courage I could muster. I’ve been pushing the boulder up the hill, attempting to do my part in this evolution full-on for decades. 

Wise Woman Wisdom

However, now that I’ve stepped into my wise woman years, my body refuses to do it the same way. It doesn’t matter what any other part of me says. My body is forcing me to listen more closely to its deep wisdom than ever.

And today, with tears streaming down my face, the wisdom that arose in meditation was this inquiry, “How can I continue to give of myself in this torrent of evolution that humanity is walking through day after day, month after month…and also claim more of me—my joy, my body, my peace, my play, my rest, my happiness, and my fun?”

Claiming More of Me—More of Us

How can we, as light leaders, healers, medicine people, activists, way showers, and starseeds, do what we came to do to fully help humanity heal, awaken, and evolve while we also fully claim our own life as well? 

How can we lay the foundations of a better world for our children and seven generations to come while also not forgetting that this is our life, too? And that our body and being need immaculate tending, love, and care. 

If we only work for the future, then we are not here now. 

And if we are not here now, then we are not fully living our lives.

As Eckhart Tolle says, 

“Life is now. There was never a time when your life was not now, nor will there ever be.”

So, if you are feeling this with me, I invite us both to go looking and dive into the inquiry of what it means and how it looks in our lives to allow this journey of evolution to be a marathon, not a sprint. And, while we live into the answers, I invite us also to smell the roses, laugh, get our grove on, nurture our peace, and find our fun.  

Right now, to me, this looks like sitting in a hammock overlooking the Pacific Ocean.

Here’s to more life! ❤️🙏🏼🌊🌴☀️🌈

With All My Love,

Melissa

P.S. If you are moved and resonate with this, I would love to hear from you in the comments below.

Dr. Melissa Sophia Joy, ND founded Somatic Awakening and is an internationally-known spiritual teacher and author. With the support of many higher dimensional guides, she is pioneering a roadmap to transformative healing and spiritual awakening through the path of Somatic Awakening®. She is the Founding Director of Sophia Healing Academy and is a Naturopathic Doctor. She is a specialist in Mind-Body-Spirit Counseling, Ordained Oracle, and Intuitive. She is also a carrier of an ancient wisdom tradition of opening to our own unique connection to the divine and tapping into the potent energy of healing that resides there. She is also an Ancient Starseed who remembers many earthly and galactic incarnations and profoundly understands the importance of the evolutionary arc of healing, awakening, and embodiment that humanity is currently in.